purpose

I began this blog as a vessel for my thoughts in regard to my studies in spirituality and healing modalities and my experiences thereof, and hope to keep lorakellydesigns dedicated to my jewelry business and the "lighter" side of life as a woman, business owner, mother, artist, etc. But how can one really part and parcel out their lives in so many words? If it's anything like my filing systems ... heaven help me! I suppose both posts will inevitably contain all of who I am, and in that case, I can only try my best to focus here on those aspects of my life I wish to examine in more detail.



I began keeping a diary, or journaling as it is now called, when I was a child and have written much of what I've experienced in my life as some form of prose or poetry over the years. Despite what I have been told, I have always known somehow that believing is seeing ... not the other way around. And I am grateful for that innate knowledge as it has been a blessing to me.



When I was a child, I once told my mother about fairies who fluttered above my bed at night and who followed me about the woods. I only remember her response was anger. She was a religious woman, Catholic, and of course she was frightened. Based on her initial reaction, I realized it was best to keep such things to myself. I remember shutting down like a telescope folding in on itself. And for many years I did not see them, as I focused instead on seeing what everyone else saw, what I was allowed and expected to see in order to fit in and win approval.



I became overwhelmingly interested in spirituality at around 21 years old, having had several powerful dreams that brought me to that age old question of seekers everywhere, what am I? I could not find that Self I sought in the Christian Bible, though bits of truth lie there, still I could not condone nor accept an angry, jealous or judgmental God. Much too close to humans who can be so callous, elitist and self involved. I continued to read whatever I could find, and listened to those whom I admired who seemed to hold the secret to happiness, who lived compassionate, humble lives. Mystics, all of different religions, who's ultimate teachings culminated in harmony with one another, and forcing me to one conclusion. Eventually, I would have to go it alone, seeking within and they were right. Only there have I found the truth that resonates with my heart. And I do not believe it to be true, but know it.



I have worked many years in the corporate world, quietly keeping my truth to myself, but sharing love silently and dispersing the energy where it might fall and I have watched it's effects with wonder. On the sidelines, unbeknownst to many, I am also a Reiki practitioner, Tarot reader, Hypnotherapist, student of truth, student of life... and teacher. Yet I don't consider myself a product of the New Age ... nor a product of my environment, for that matter. But rather see myself as a cause of both, understanding with the certaintly that comes from experience, the creative function of thought, and that all that the body sees and experiences is due to our subconscious mind, our guarded and/or unguarded thinking, and what we see, good or bad, is based upon our "perspective" ... or "way" of viewing; and how we feel about what we view, is continually projected back upon us. In otherwords, as we judge, so are we judged.


One thing I have learned to be ultimately true without question; True and lasting change only comes at the level of the unconscious mind, as it continually projects our world. So that is where the work must begin. Self-love is the most important undertaking of all. And so I am on the same journey begun long ago with all of you, for we are one. My own path continues to be one of self discovery, and I understand yours to be the same. My journey and yours includes the healing of an ancient soul that dwells in guilt and forgetfulness. As such, I hope to continually touch upon that deepest part of myself where the wound lies open, and thus to begin to heal it. It is a complex journey of return to that perfect state of peace from whence we have all come, and all, without exception will return. Then again, perhaps we are already there, and all of this is merely a dream.